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Domestic violence is everyone's business

A woman comes to the newspaper office and asks about an online story the paper published about another woman accused of killing her husband. She’s clearly agitated and almost in tears, hands shaking as they take a tissue out of her purse.

Explaining she’d been the couple’s landlord for nearly a decade, the woman seemed desperate for details about what happened.

“I can’t believe it,” she says. “I’m really in shock here.”

Then she drops the other shoe.

“We always thought he’d be the one to kill her,” the woman said, shaking her head.

Thankfully, this scenario didn’t happen here in Laramie. Unfortunately, it did happen in similar community of about the same population, political makeup and other demographics.

More importantly, this woman’s reaction to a couple she knows involved in domestic violence so severe it leaves one dead isn’t unique. How many times have you opened your local newspaper only to see a familiar name in the police blotter under the heading “Domestic Violence?” Chances are, at least a few.

With October being Domestic Violence Awareness Month, we’re compelled to push the message that domestic violence is everyone’s business. It’s not a family’s dirty little secret and not to be ignored when we see it happening.

How differently could the above scenario have unfolded had the woman, who had for years been aware of the couple’s penchant for violence against each other, reported even one instance?

Statistically, the numbers say Wyoming isn’t a domestic violence hot spot, ranking 30th in the United States for violent incidents per capita. And as the Equality State, we shouldn’t be surprised that the reported rates of domestic violence for men and women are the same at 35.8%.

Oklahoma has the highest rate against women at 49.1%, meaning nearly half that state’s population of women report having been a victim of domestic violence at some point.

The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence estimates 10 million people a year experience domestic violence. A little math shows that’s about 20 victims per minute.

That more than a third of Wyoming men and women admit a connection to domestic violence may not rank the Cowboy State high compared to others, but it’s appalling and unacceptable all the same.

We have some great resources to help break this cycle:

Domestic Violence Hotline: 208-587-3300

Wyoming Coalition Against Domestic Violence: 307-755-5481

SAFE Project: 307-742-7273

Consider an average first-grade class of 30 students in elementary school. The data says at least 10 will grow up to be victims of domestic violence. And that’s if they’re not already in an abusive home.

We can’t continue to hold that domestic violence is somehow a secret family matter. It’s not. It’s a crime.

If you see it, if you know of it happening or even if you suspect, report it. You’d do it without hesitation if you knew of a neighbor or acquaintance was abusing a dog.

-Laramie Boomerang

 

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