Fishing for answers

Sixty plus years ago, Dad and I would arise at 4 a.m. in Torrington and have our lines in the water by first light at Glendo. We caught a ton (slight exaggeration) of fish there. As the years passed, as well as Dad, I began to realize that my mind wasn’t reliving the thrill of reeling in a good sized Rainbow, it was reveling in the warmth of a father/son relationship that transcended who could land the largest trout of the day though that competition was delightful.

Worries, frets, regrets, and anxieties were left back in Torrington for Mom to take care of, and future cares were absorbed by the next cast and the next strike. In between was the cooler filled with goodies to occupy the slow times when sitting in our canvas chairs talking and watching a pole jerk to the tugging of a hungry hooked finny creature and hoping that it would wiggle its way off the hook because listening to Dad’s stories was so much more interesting than landing the eighth catch of the day.

When presented with a youthful problem that seemed so critical, his first comment was always a question couched in a way that seemed to say he valued my opinion, “What do you think would be best there?” or “How do you think that should be handled?” or “What are your other options?” He seemed to always think that I had the best answer because after all I was the one with the problem or in the situation. I was on the spot!

We Americans have a problem; it’s not the divisions which separate us. Those are only the consequence of the real problem. We’ve stopped trusting each other, and we no longer bother to listen to one another. This portends a coming catastrophe if we don’t stop demonizing each other. I’m not a Trump fan, but he won. (I have gotten a life since the election.) Putting all the questions about how or why he won aside, we must for our own national good health get back to constructive conversations about how this country can meet its responsibilities to its citizens, and play a mature grown-up role in the world.

Expecting to fail in this effort is not our nature. There will be future elections, and there will be winners and losers. When the winners no longer care to listen to the ideas of the losers because they won, the country loses. When the losers think that they should have an equal right to plot the course of the country, the country loses. When we work together to reach goals we agree on, and agree to disagree civilly, the country wins. It’s as important to be a good winner as it is to be a good loser.